just between us...

My high school career was spent between the music wing, yearbook office, and the theatre of Stow High School. The bulk of time was most definitely spent in rehearsals for plays and musicals. At this stage in my life I had natural abilities that the directors saw and used. One director pulled more out of me than I ever expected. Mr. Putka.

Mr. Putka was an extremely talented artist. He had the ability to paint three dimensional bricks or siding on a piece of plywood. He was able to make a paper mache sculpture look as though it was made out of Italian marble. His voice was roaring, but he knew how to use it to calm and soothe or fill a 600 seat auditorium.

Students at our school fought to get into Putka's plays. He did good shows, yes. But, the real win was the opportunity to work with him. My junior year I had the chance. I was cast in "Look Homeward, Angel" in a lead role. I was estatic. Being a lead role you spent more time with Putka. He gave you deeper feedback. You really had the chance to learn.

So, we started practices and I was doing great. I had most of my lines memorized. I had the blocking down. I knew my Southern accent. I had my movements and characterization perfected. Then - it happened.

One night in practice Putka drilled down on me in front of the entire cast. He picked apart my blocking. He challenged my accent. He questioned my choices of movements and characterization. I was crushed. I thought I was doing everything so well - what went wrong. As I sat there in front of the cast my chin started quivering and a few tears just rolled down my cheeks.

After practice that night Putka pulled me aside and explained our interaction. He explained how much he cared for me and how he wanted me to succeed. He unpacked the potential he saw in me as an actor and a leader. Putka said I was doing great, but he knew there was so much more in me I hadn't given. That night something changed. I grew as an actor, leader, and as a person.

As we go through life we are constantly changing and growing. If you're lucky - like me - you have people in your life who are genuinely interested in you as a person and want you to grow. It's our job to give people permission to speak into our lives and really make changes. Even when we sit there with chins quivering and tears rolling down our cheeks we can know that we're being pushed to change and grow because someone sees something in us that we haven't seen ourselves. It's painful to hear that we aren't reaching our potential or we're doing something to stunt our growth, but when that's said in love and genuine interest we can rest assured that our best is waiting on the other side of the hurt.

Putka had a saying. True then - true today...

"Nothing but the best and no regrets."

I want to live my life offering the best I know how and looking back witout regrets.