just between us...

have you ever seen those assessment tests? you know, those quizzes where you answer questions to find out what you're going to be when you grow up. how about the test you take to find out what spiritual gifts you have? or how about the quiz on facebook to determine which "Friends" character you are? okay, maybe not the last one...

now, i'm not dissing those quizzes because they can be very helpful. i mean, i took them when i was younger and some actually helped me see things in myself i hadn't before. but, i think sometimes we spend so much time taking the tests and quizzes about ourselves that we actually miss out on living and serving.

want to know how i really found out about myself? want to know my secret? i DID something. i got in the game. i learned more about my giftedness and my serving abilities while i was actually serving. i learned more about my personal goals and passions while i was doing something - anything - even if it wasn't the ideal.

you want my advice? if you want to know what God wants you to do; if you want to figure out how you're gifted - start doing something. seriously, stop analyzing and evaluating and start serving.

it's when we're in motion that God can use us - danger comes in stagnant living.

gonna continue with the fans vs. friends topic.

most people like the fans - and they get the friends and fans confused, i do too. fans come and go. they swoop in your life and tell you want you want or need to hear - and do it with boldness. after all, they have nothing to lose. we admire their courage, but they are risking nothing.

a friend gives you advice or a kick in the pants, but they are slow to speak and quick to listen. quick to listen - slow to speak. you see, when you're a true friend you are doing life with someone. relationship must move from professional to personal. you know their other person's personality and still like them. sometimes you hurt each other, but at the end of the day you'd do anything for the other person.

i don't want to be a swooper. i don't want to come into someone's life like a tornado and tell them truth, give them advice, mess them up and leave. i'm in it for the long haul people.

doing life together is hard.



think about this - are you giving more time and trust to the swoopers?
or - are you looking to the friends to do life with you?

in a lifetime you'll have hundreds of fans, but the friendships are what will really matter.

read a great blog this week by steven furtick about the difference between a fan and a friend. have you ever heard of this? he combined a bunch of teachings he's heard in his blog post. i've been thinking about it and thought i would share.

whenever you're in a position in the public eye - leading an organization, working at a church, involved in the community, etc... - you have two types of people in your life. fans and friends.

a fan is someone who is there for you. fans love to be around you because of the energy you bring. they love you because you both love the same things - and the minute they find someone else who loves the same things, but they can be with them at a limited personal expense - they are gone.

a friend is someone who is there with you. a friend is someone who is doing life with you. friends celebrate with you in your success - but more importantly they are with you in times of defeat. a friend knows you in a real way and they still like you. when the charisma and the energy wear off they are still there - and it seems like there is nothing you can do to run them off. they are committed.

man, we all need more friends in our lives. sometimes it seems we give more attention to the fans because of the way they make us feel. the fans make us feel like we add value. but, we all really need to pay more attention to the friends in our lives. we really need to work hard to prioritize the people in our lives who are willing to walk along with us through the ups and downs of life.

fans aren't bad. they can help you and encourage you, but in the course of a lifetime fans will come and go - friends will always be there, no matter how hard it gets or how hard you push.

Check it.